Authentically Joycelynn

Ministry Outside The Box: Inspiring Christian Believers for Kingdom Purpose

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Travel Day to Europe is HERE!

Travel Day Has Arrived

I’d dreamed of this day for over a year! I couldn’t believe it was all in order and now I had awakened to the most fabulous day! The first thing I noticed was I felt like I heard a “pop” in my mouth. Like my jaw popped. That’s not what it was. It was a cap on one of my front teeth. Not one of the two in the middle. It was the one on the right, right beside my middle teeth. It was NOT fixable. I was left with a metal post hanging down in the place where the cap of a tooth had once been.

One of my worst nightmares realized on one of the biggest days of my life.  Just a background, but as a child I had TONS of strep throat events in a two year period and had been exposed to Tetracycline…over and over and over again. It had ruined my teeth. Little by little, the damage to my teeth has been experienced, to where I’m at the point I need a major overhaul on my teeth. It’s not from lack of brushing or taking care of them. It from the exposure to the drug many years ago. I’d had to have a root canal on this particular tooth when I was pregnant with my second child. And…now it was gone. If I smile openly, the gap is there.  I made the decision right then and there… I’m NOT my teeth. I’m NOT my inadequacies. I’m a worthy individual, even with a glaring gap in my teeth. I’m good enough even in spite of my deficiencies. I’m saving money for major dental work…and it’s not going to happen on travel day.

Point here…realize your worth is NOT in what you feel is an inadequacy. Your value as a person is internal not external.  That’s enough about my tooth. I told you I was going to share EVERYTHING that impacted me on this trip!

Vulnerability

I can’t continue this series without letting you know how I was feeling inside about the trip. I never had what I would say “fear” about the trip. About a week before the trip, I began to have a little struggle on the inside. The current state of our world is enough to give anyone pause. I’d be flying into a city (Paris)  where terrorist activity had killed 130 people only a few months prior (November 2015). I’d be flying into a city where only a few weeks ago, an airplane left the airport and the people aboard were never seen again. I’d be traveling to a train station in a city where only a few months prior had been prey to a terrorist attack bombing at their airport (Belgium). I silently wondered if when I left this country, would I see my family again.

Would I find myself involved in being in the right place at the wrong time were a terrorist acticity occur? I had to say, the reason or purpose for my trip outweighed any fear or thoughts of my own demise. What I purposed to do and learn outweighed the chance that I would face something devastating. I knew if something happened to me, it could never be said I allowed fear to keep me from doing something that could be life-changing by taking the chance. So now you know. I did think about my own mortality. I’m a woman of strong faith and relationship with God. By my own understanding, I’d still be OK, even if I no longer existed in this earthly vessel. I did phone all my kids before I left. Telling them how much I loved them. I also had that same love conversation with my mother and my husband. None of them knew the thoughts I had or why I was making sure I spoke to each of them before I left.

That’s all I’m sharing for this post. I’m back home. So, you all know I didn’t meet a demise at the hands of terrorists. I’m so enriched by this experience. The next blog post will be a bit more colorful. Yes. This is where the funny Becky Bloomfield stories of the Shopaholic series starts. It started the moment this diva stepped out into foreign soil.

Love you and and thanks for reading and following along with me on this journey. It’s not really about me…for me it’s about sharing my story and inspiring your to create yours.

I’d love to hear from you! Leave me a comment below and let me know a little about you!

PS… I’ve got about 14 more posts to write in this series… Each day was so full, and SO many beautiful pics I’ll be including! Be sure to check back for new articles over the next few days!

Here is the next post. Stress Free Diva Goes to Europe: Departure and Arrival.

Be Well,

Joyce

 

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Self-Responsibility, Mindfulness, & Gratefulness

Self Responsibility

Healing begins on the inside. From the most fit-appearing person to the most un-fit appearing…healing begins internally. It’s a mindset, not an appearance. So, open your mindset to allow a gentle healing to begin within.  Recognize we are responsible for our health and wellbeing. We are faced with choices continually during the day. Society during the years has promoted that other people know what is best for us. That includes our teachers, our health care providers, and even the media.

This type of logic will keep us in a perpetual state of looking for that magic book, pill, or health care provider which will give us the right answer for our wellbeing. It’s really not so. We have the answers within us for our own well-being journey. We do need to search out information from experts. The issue becomes when we shift responsibility to others we give up personal ownership of our lives. As a nurse, I can’t tell you how many people take medications on a daily basis and have no idea what they are taking, or why they are taking it. They tell me they do whatever their doctor tells them to do. So, realizing we are responsible for our choices is step 1. Become an active participant in any health care you receive.

 

Mindfulness & Gratefulness

 

Let’s start right now by taking 5 minutes to do nothing else but be still. Allow yourself just to sit or lie still for a moment. Get comfortable. Clear your mind of the day’s or evening’s duties. Take just 5 minutes to ignore everything around you and take your mind to a place of gratefulness for the day. Start with a few slow, deep breaths. Within yourself, give a word of thankfulness either for the day ahead, or for the things you’ve experienced.  Be mindful of your day.

I actually DO this every morning. Some days I’m up at 5:00 AM to head out early to work. After getting my bath and I rush to get ready… I stop for a few moments. I lie back down on my bed. I close my eyes and take a few deep breaths. I meditate a few moments about my upcoming day. I take time to pray, and give thanks for the awesome say I’m going to experience. I develop a heart of gratitude for my peaceful day. I think about all the lives I’m going to touch that day. I get up with a sense of calm and peace. It really helps!

 

If you have a nook or kindle device, find a really nice e-book to enjoy. Louise Hay has a really nice book about healing, called  Heal Your Body. You know, we beat ourselves up for very small things. Underlying issues could be we don’t feel worthy, we don’t feel good enough, or we feel guilty for investing time in ourselves when look around and see all the “stuff” that needs our attention.

Let’s begin to understand the awesomeness we have within and beging to shift ownership of our life from others and begin to trust ourselves. Begin to love who we are and what we have to contribute to our own wholeness.

I’ve sent this article out to those on my email list. Oh, it’s got a few added things like a smoothie recipe, and a body scrub recipe. I share extra goodies with those on my mailing list…

Enjoy your day and evening.

Be well,

Joyce

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Setting Boundaries on Social Media to Reduce Stress

 

Setting Boundaries on Social Media to Reduce Stress

I’ve started setting boundaries on social media to reduce stress. Have you ever experienced negativity in your newsfeeds? Have you every been involved in groups where people getting into arguments? Possibly you’ve even made a status update and had people break out in an argument from your post? 

I’ve found in social media that many people hide behind their computers and say things they would NEVER say in person. It’s almost like the anonymity gives people this brass boldness to speak harshly and however they like especially if they are making comments to people they don’t know.  This can happen in any social media setting. I’m going to speak mostly about Facebook, since that is one I am on most of the time, and have the most experience with.

 

Setting Boundaries in a Group

I’m a member of SEVERAL groups on Facebook, and it’s very important to set boundaries. Maybe I should have started with personal timelines, but the groups really irritated me today, so I’m starting with the groups. Now, certainly if you are a drama queen, and LOVE to instigate the drama, this information won’t apply. However, I like to have peaceful surroundings and I’m constantly monitoring those situations I have control over. 

First of all, PLEASE do not AUTOMATICALLY ADD people to your group. It is common courtesy to send someone a message or ask them on their timeline to join your group and send them a link to it. If they desire to join the group, they will. Invite people. Let THEM make the decision. Yea. That is a pet peeve of mine. I think for that reason I don’t like the “Facebook parties” that have become so popular. You aren’t invited. You are added. That usually turns me off right away from whatever the are selling. Do you feel the same way?

When you DO join a group, unless you want a gazillion notifications, go immediately to the notifications and modify the group. You can keep the notifications just like they are (and you will get a notification on every post), you can turn notifications off, you can get friends posts notifications, or only highlights. 

If in a group, you can also decide if you want that group to be a “favorite” group, meaning it will show up more in your newsfeed. If the group gets annoying at anytime, but you want to still see what’s going on from time to time, you can “unfollow” the group. That way you will need to make a purposeful effort to look up the group to see what’s being talked about.  If they group gets really annoying or there seems to be a lot of negative drama in the group, you can also “leave” the group. At this time you have the choice to decide whether someone can add you back in the group, or whether no one can add you back to the group.  

A good group has good moderators that try and oversee the posts which may erupt into arguments or someone who may be doing spammy advertising. Even with the best of moderators, the groups can get out of hand especially with hot button topics like “which essential oil company is best”,  or groups where other hot topic themes may occur. 

That’s pretty much the basics for groups on Facebook. 

Your Personal News-feed

Social Media Reducing Stress

 

Negative people. It’s inevitable. You will find yourself having friend-ed people on Facebook or Twitter, who are negative. This could be a relative, or someone you went to high school with. It could even be your best friend. Just how do you handle your “friends” on Facebook. 

Be picky about who you accept as a friend on any social media. Do you know the individual sending a friend request? Do you have mutual friends or have you maybe “met” the individual in a group?

When negative or offensive conversations end up on your news-feed there are several actions you can take.

  1. You may want to determine if the offensive conversation is “out of the norm” from your friend. Maybe they are having a bad day, or are having difficulty handling a circumstance or situation in their life. I usually look at the patterns of this “friend”. If they are normal positive and have things to offer, I usually ignore one offense and chalk it up to a bad day.
  2. You can “unfollow” an individual. When you “friend” an individual there is an icon that is automatically turned on called “Follow”. It’s very easy to “unfollow” and they will not show up on your newsfeed anymore. You will have to actually put their name in a search to see their status updates and recent posts. This is a GREAT way to get constant “advertising” out of your feed. Some companies actually encourage their “reps” to post constantly about their products. Yep. That’s probably a product I’m NOT going to use. Just saying. If people want what you have, they will ASK you for more information. (yes many years ago, I’m sure I made this mistake and I’m very sure people have unfollowed me over it, and it’s OK. We ALL learn from our mistakes)
  3. You CAN unfriend people. Really. You don’t have to create drama and call out the individual. Just unfriend. You really don’t owe an explanation to anyone. Really you don’t.
  4. You can also set people to “acquaintances”. This way, if you don’t want everyone seeing or reading, or commenting on your posts, you can send your posts out “custom”, and sent to everyone but “acquaintances.
  5. You can BLOCK people. Yes. I’ve blocked people. This way you will not see what they post, and they cannot find you. Sometimes this is your only option if you find that an individual is “stalking” you or causing more drama and stress than you want.

I find by setting boundaries on social media that I can reduce my stress. I like peaceful supportive friends. I like to be a peaceful supportive friend. On occasion I may put up a rant. It’s rare. I love to share uplifting positive posts and articles. Everyone has a bad day from time to time. I love being able to look on Facebook and find encouragement.

Creating simple steps in all areas of your life to reduce stress really begin to add up! Sign up for my newsletter to start getting tips to reduce YOUR stress!

Be Well! Be De-Stressed!

Joyce

 

 

 

 

 

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How Do I Get Out Of Debt?

How Do I Get Out Of Debt

 

How Do I Get Out of Debt?

How do I get out of debt? Have you EVER asked yourself this question? For too many years I have desired this, yet never really took sincere steps to do it. The road to debt was paved with easy terms, slick advertising, and not understanding sound financial principles. As I’ve pondered this, I realize I can only blame myself. Searching deeper on this topic of finances I realized this was “hush hush” in my home growing up. Possibly that’s how it was in many homes. I don’t blame my parents. They did the best they knew how at that time. They were responsible with their money. We always had our needs met with clothing, food and shelter. I never remember a time of “lack” or going without. In that regard I was blessed.

While I mention I didn’t experience what it was like to be without basic needs, I do remember my mother making most of my clothes and her clothes because she could make them cheaper than store bought. (which now, home sown clothes are probably more quality driven than most store bought)  To this day, my mother still denies herself things like store bought clothing. She really isn’t physically able to sew anymore, but when she is taken to the mall, she will always say things are too expensive and she will make do with what she has.

Mom and dad grew up during the depression era many years ago, so they know what it’s like to be without, and they were wise with their money possibly out of fear of being without. While they were great at budgeting and saving money, they didn’t talk about money. The mind blocks I received in my childhood regarding money boiled down to two basic things. I have lived most of my adulthood believing 1) I can’t afford it and 2) there is never enough.  Let me add a third false belief: I’m not worthy of having.

Does this sound familiar? Money woes will put a strain on a marriage. Money pressure will cause so much stress that physical symptoms appear. Let me also say that choices made early on in my life contribute to some of our poor financial decisions. My husband and I married while he was still in college. I had not finished college when we married, and I didn’t go back to school until all three of our children were born. We didn’t start out our married life well established financially. We made our first big mistake by charging bedroom furniture at Sears and then only paying the minimum due. We’ve spent our married life between a rock and a hard place with the false belief that the next month will be better. Have you ever hear the phrase “you cannot keep doing the same thing and expect different results”? Well…that’s exactly what we have done, and many of you do. Start to seriously ask yourself: How Do I Get Out Of Debt! 

How Do I get Out of Debt

Best Way To Become Debt Free

The best way to become debt free and get a handle on finances is to take an honest look at your situation. Facing your spending habits, looking at all your bills, and taking an honest look at your money beliefs is a really good start. It really doesn’t matter how much money you make.  Let me say that again. It doesn’t matter how much money you make. People who do not make very much money but understand how to handle their money can be better off than people who have a high paying job and don’t know how to handle finances. It all begins with that question you need to ask yourself: How Do I Get Out Of Debt!

A few years ago we owed about $16,000 in credit card debt. Until I sat down with my credit card statements, I had NO idea we owed that much money.  I was behind on payments because I didn’t have a good system to pay my bills. I actually contacted a debt solutions firm and they helped me by contacting each creditor and the late fees were stopped, and lower interest payments were agreed upon, and I started making payments every pay day to the debt solutions company and they paid my bills. The money was taken out of my bank account every other week on pay day (it was easier for me to divide the payments up than to pay once a month).  I will tell you that in mid May, 2016 we will be debt free from out credit cards!!!  DO NOT go and get a consolidation loan to cover your credit cards. You will only go out and obtain more credit cards and then you will have that consolidation loan AND your new credit card balances.  If you are disciplined, you can set your credit card payments up correctly to “snowball”. If not, do what we did and get a company to help you. We used Green Path Debt Solutions.

When you set this in motion, you need to say NO to more debt.  We paid off our car last year. Both of our cars are paid for now. They are old. They aren’t the latest and greatest models. The cars run well. We keep them serviced.

What we have left now is honestly a big student loan I’ve neglected from when I went back to finish my bachelors in nursing (which I didn’t finish)  and another bill that wasn’t a credit card. I will be transparent here. That amount comes to about $16,000.  That is our next project to pay off. We also owe $106,000 on our mortgage. We plan to pay that off too.

OK. So, we honestly went about this all wrong because we got the cart before the horse. It was GREAT that we were paying down our credit card bills, and that we didn’t run out and get a new car when we got our old ones paid off. We still had not addressed our habits.

Now we are. If you are married and want to see things in your household change, you need to sit down with your partner and have a conversation. It’s best to be on the same page.

The 4 Laws Of Financial Prosperity

We are using a simple system now.  I’ve got a Cash Envelope and a really cool book by Blaine Harris and Charles Coonradt called The 4 Laws of Financial Prosperity.

How Do I Get Out Of Debt

Here is the Book:

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The 4 Laws of Financial ProsperityThe 4 Laws of Financial ProsperityThe 4 Laws of Financial Prosperity [Audio CD]The 4 Laws of Financial Prosperity [Audio CD]

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Here is the Cash Envelope System:

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Deluxe Executive Envelope System (Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University)Deluxe Executive Envelope System (Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University)Red Designer Wallet Envelope System (Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University)Red Designer Wallet Envelope System (Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University)

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I have some of Dave Ramsey’s books, and they are good. I’ve never gone through Financial Peace University, but I hear very good things about it. I like the 4 Laws of Financial Prosperity because it is SIMPLE!

Basically, there are 4 things you REALLY need to start doing. You don’t have to start them at the same time. The first thing you really need to do is to track what you spend. You will be AMAZED at how much you spend on little things. A soda from the machine. Eating out. Impulse buying. I’m SUCH an impulse buyer.

The second thing you need to do is see where you can trim expenses. Over the past few years, we have gotten rid of cable TV, we have disconnected our home phone because we use cell phones now. We did purchase an “Apple Box” that we can run Hulu and Netflix through. We do pay for those but are under $20.00/month for both. We did keep our internet service which you need to run the Apple Box, Hulu and Netflix through. We stopped using Redbox and renting movies. We don’t go to the Movie Theater. See where you can shave off your expenses.

I won’t get into the third and fourth things, as I don’t want to give away all the tips from the book. It’s an easy read though. Truly it is. It’s in a story form, so it’s sort of fun to see how the character in the book applies these financial principles.

Being WELL includes financial wellness. It truly does. As I shared earlier: stress will bring on physical problems. Not only will financial illness harm you physically, but it will have an impact on your emotions, your family, your relationships, and all areas of your life.

I’m a wellness coach, and I’m working on these areas of my life which need to be healed. I’ll be blogging my financial healing journey. Our financial well-being is a work in progress. I’m excited to share my journey with you!

Be Well,

Joyce